WUT IT DO?

I'm sure you've heard Paul Wall toss this "greeting" out countless times before. Not only is it grammatically incorrect, it sounds stupid as hell, and it makes no logical sense. For example: If I'm meeting you for the first time, and offer you a handshake and the greeting "Wut it do?", how am I supposed to know what "it" is? If we don't have a grasp on what "it" is, how can you provide the information of what "it" is doing? Therefore, this phrase has been banned from Mike Conners vocab---and the Planet Earth as well. I actually took a poll one nite (in my head) and it was in unanimous agreement. If you hear someone uttering the phrase "Wut it do" please take a moment to report the violator to me by email. Thank you for your cooperation.

I know I'm a little late on this but the song "About us" came on the radio today and I was listening to it...



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Thats what I talkin bout Willis!

AAAH Sleep!

Ahhh....I got to sleep in late today. Have you ever slept in late before? Did you wake up early, while you were sleeping late? Cuz that happened to me as well. I was like, "Damn, here I am waking up early, while I'm sleeping late." Do you ever read certain sentences you've written, and laugh out loud because you think you're so funny? I do. Happens all the time. Let's see if I can spell the word "necessary" today. Yep, that's it. No need to even look it up to double-check. Although, I'm confident a few readers WILL look it up, in hopes to catch me in the wrong, and rub it in my face. But I'm quite confident that's not gonna happen here.

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Thats what I talkin bout Willis!

MUTE!

If you choose to have a conversation with me via telephone, we're gonna have to cover the groundrules.I'm not interested in your need to show off your latest cool, new, rap CD that's blaring in the background. I'm not gonna find you the slightest bit more interesting if your "Head spins round right round when you go down when you go down." TURN the damn radio OFF. And if you choose to leave your radio ON, turn the volume ALL THE WAY DOWN, so I can hear NO music in the background. I've already taken the appropriate measures to ensure you receive the same superstar treatment when calling me.
It's a matter of respect. If I'm gonna take time out of my life to include you, make me a top priority as well; and don't force me to compete with your favorite rapper as we shout, "Huh? What'd you say?" back and forth. Same thing with the television---hit the MUTE button. It's simple and it's fun. It'll also burn more calories, which will help you look and feel better.Thank you in advance.

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Thats what I talkin bout Willis!

Chain Letters

So, I signed into my AOL email today and heard that voice saying "you've got mail", I like that voice, it give me a feeling of "hey people like me." So all excited that I have mail, I look at the screen that tells me how many new messages I have. It says 103. Wow 103 new emails, people must REALLY like me. So now Im REALLY excited, I can't wait to open up my mailbox. So I do just that. After opening my mailbox I take a second to scroll down thru the 103 new messages to get an idea of who they are from and what they are about. The further I go down the list the more my excitment disipates. Out of 103 emails all but 2 of them are chain letters. The other 2 were from my mom.

"Forward this to 10 people within the next 10 minutes and a message will pop up on your screen telling you your one true love, if you do not foward it you will have a bad love life for the next 10 years." Come on are people REALLY that dumb that they think becuase you send it to 10 people your computer is going to not only realize that you have sent it to 10 people but it is then going to magically become a wizard and predict who the love of your life will be. BUT if you do not send it to atleast 10 people in 10 minutes your computer will know that too, and boy let me tell you what, you do not want to be on the recieving end of the wrath from your computer, becuase it will curse you with a bad love life for 10 years. Computers can apparently do a lot of things, it can make the love of your life call you, it can make you money, it can make you popular. But it can also give you bad luck. Boy my computer is powerful!

I have now started my own chain letter. This is what it says.

You have been hit with this bs chain letter. Send it to 10 people in the next 10 minutes and ab-so-fucking-lutely nothing will happen!

I hate chain letters and I would greatly appreciate it if you didnt send them to me and give me a false excitement that people ACTUALLY want to talk to me about something reasonable. This is a simple request. Please abide by it.

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Thats what I talkin about Willis!